What is Flakiness

Flakiness refers to when someone consistently cancels plans, misses dates, or remains unresponsive without good reason. It indicates unreliability or lack of commitment. Just remember that flakiness is rarely about you. It’s usually about their low readiness, poor organizational skills, or dating fatigue. Here are some tips how to handle flakiness.

How to Handle Flakiness

1. Don’t Over-Invest Early

• If someone cancels or disappears occasionally at the beginning, keep your expectations light

2. Arrange First Date Quickly

• Aim to set up a low-pressure meeting within the first week of chatting
• Prolonged texting can lead to flakiness

3. Send Confirmation Text

• If you arranged the date much earlier, send a quick confirmation text message before the date

4. Have a Plan B

• When making plans with someone new, have a backup plan
• In case they ditch you, call a friend or have something fun to do by yourself

5. Don’t Chase

• If they cancel and don’t offer another plan, resist the urge to keep proposing new times
• If they’re interested, they’ll suggest another time

6. Protect Your Schedule

• Avoid rearranging your entire week for someone who hasn’t proven reliable
• Your time is also important

7. Set Boundaries

• If someone misses a date without a valid reason and an immediate plan to reschedule, move on

8. Know When to Walk Away

• By moving on quickly, you save your energy for someone who is actually excited to meet you

9. Don’t Take It Personally

• Flakiness often says more about their life, priorities, or dating style than about you

Woman waiting her date outside a cafe. AI image